BLOW A GASKET

If I had a gasket...Virginia in the underwriting department just blew it!
If I was pregnant...I would be in the hospital in pre-term labor!
If you could see my face...you'd be very, very scared!
I feel like my eyes grew springs and popped out of the socket!
I sympathize with my children because, right now, I would like to (for just this once) throw myself on the floor and scream at the top of my lungs!

Get it. I'm mad.

So why doesn't Virginia get it. I have been dealing with her for 3 months and I have, as our mother's would say: HAD IT UP TO HERE!

So let's go back and catch you all up on what led to this explosion. Chad started his own business in December thus putting us on our own for insurance. No big deal right.

Wrong. Chad has high cholesterol so individual insurance doesn't weight out in our favor. So we started going the business route. Only, it's now a new year. Last years taxes have to be done. Only...we got really tweaked this year but I'll spare you the details. So we needed a second opinion and an extension. So that's that.

Then we find out Costco has pretty decent insurance now. So we started the process. Then we find out there is no maternity coverage for me...so I have to drop out of what seems to be this never ending race to get insurance...all while praying along the way that no one gets hurt and my health holds up better than last year. So Chad and the kids are still on board. I start applying for individual insurance by myself since I am in great health. Despite last years freaky rashes (doctor's diagnosed as an allergic reaction) and my lump in my breast (scar tissue from nursing).

So, we wait. And wait. And wait.

"A few more days"..."we're very busy"..."something isn't filled out right" (but on our copy here at home is! urgh...and we faxed it so how was it any different!)..."we're very busy"...then "we just got your medical info from your doctor"..."we're busy"..."underwriting is reviewing your medical information" and the comment we were sick of hearing..."CALL BACK IN A FEW DAYS!" Seriously, I am going to rip someones head off!

So we go to the river. Come home and we have our letters. HALELUJAH!

Wrong, again. They raised Chad's premium for his high cholesterol...started the insurance without approving the new premium. But, oh well, at this point they are covered at that's what matters.

Then, drum roll please...my envelope. D-E-N-I-E-D! What? You've got to be kidding me. Denied. I'm healthy. And the reason..."Upon review of medical records." Did they misunderstand things? Thinking what happened last year was serious. Scary, yes. But, all checked out fine.

So for 2 1/2 weeks I have been trying to find out exactly why! I leave message after message. No call. Finally about a week later. A call...but of course I was at work with a message "call us back." So message. message....what someone answers. Fabulous. When I asked why I was denied I got this in return..."Oh we can't give that information over the phone, you'll have to email us."

So I email them. Followed with 3 follow up emails within 1 1/2 weeks...and no, not one response.

So I call the main underwriting department again. What is going on? They then tell me..."we can't disclose that information to you buy phone or email. You have to give us written consent to give it to your doctors who can give it to you." They say the reason...HIPAA. Really, because HIPAA is to protect ME! Only I should be able to get that information. So I say, "So you are telling me, I write you a letter...allowing you to send a letter with the reasons for denial to my doctor they in turn give to me." Since when are doctors in the middle of me finding out why I'm denied for insurance!

So I fax them the letter this morning. Conveniently, they didn't receive it. So we send it again. They get it this time now that I'm annoying and they say, "Ok, we will forward this on to the appropriate department and it will take at least a few days for processing." WHAT? Why couldn't I email it directly to that department! Can I have their phone number? But they tell me they don't have a number for that department. So, I throw a fit...and insist her supervisor calls me immediately (but she's not in, of course). I hang up...and there you have it...I've somehow BLOWN A GASKET I didn't know I had.

And I'm back at square one. No insurance. Wanting to get pregnant. And now needing to take my husband and my kids off their insurance because business insurance won't accept me alone! There goes my other gasket!

Meet my new NIGHTMARE...

While we were at the river, we (a few of Chad's sisters and I) decided to have a little obstacle course/race. Two of us had to jump off the rocks about 20 yards up river from the dock. Then we had to swim down river to catch one of the two ski ropes hanging off the boat (which was secured to the dock). We then had to pull ourselves up river along the ski rope and be the first one on the back deck of the boat. This can get pretty tiring because the river is pretty fast in the middle of the afternoon. So Chad's little sister decided to go against me first. Chad's mom, Alexis and his sister's Alissa and KT stayed on the boat to watch. When I finished I pulled myself up onto the back wood deck of the boat and laid on my back with my hair in the water. I was shocked how exhausted I was and definitely need to rest before standing up. I started to get up to let Emily onto the deck when Alissa started screaming bloody murder pointing next to my head on the deck. I looked to my left and this is what I saw SIX INCHES from my face. So picture that view...and this one...

...now picture that on the palm of your hand...cause it would cover the whole thing! No joke at least 3 inches big...these pictures aren't magnified people. The hair on it's legs were seriously spiky...and all I could think of was...it's not a tarantula...more like a deadly spider because it was freaky looking!

So we all started screaming and jumped in the back of the boat. Alexis was there and saw the whole thing screaming...."someone get my daddy!" However, Daddy, Jake and Grandpa were in town. So we are literally screaming there for 45 seconds unsure what to do. Would it attack us if we moved? Kt's husband was in the front yard asking how many legs it had cause we were afraid it was a brown recluse spider. (Something I have been deathly afraid of for the last two years---if you don't know about those...whew...I won't even go there since it necrosis your skin faster than the doctors treat it!) Patrick was holding their baby so he wasn't really going to run to the dock to help us. So the spider is frozen from our screaming...for 45 seconds! Then we decide to move because we were sure it wasn't going to leap on us since it was scared too!

So we move...the boat rocks from our shift in weight and the spider leaps onto the river and gracefully jumps up river 4 bounces like a rock skipping on the surface. It jumps around in a large circle and then onto the side of the boat. It definitely knew what it was doing. There was no hesitation...no "oh, what's this...water...I'm going to drown." NOPE...it leaped like it was laughing at us! So we check the side of the boat and it's crawling under the boat...into a void in the back of the boat where it isn't in the water. It just waited there hiding.

We started rocking the boat to get the water to touch where it was hiding. It peaks on us through the boat and the back deck where we originally encountered it. Seriously, it checked on us...eyes and all! So Alissa starts jabbing it with the flag..which didn't touch it because it had already gone back into hiding. And KT yells, "Alissa it's on the flag!" So Alissa (who is deathly afraid of even little spiders) throws the flag in the river and KT says, "I was just kidding!" So Alissa reacts quick and jumps in the river to retrieve the flag! But she just hung on the ski rope because she was afraid to go near the deck (the only way back on without floating down river.)

So we never saw the spider again. For all we know it could still be in/on the boat! And I think it's a fishing spider after many days of research...here's some freaky information on them:

-they rush across the surface of water to attack
-they can also dip their legs underwater and grab swimming tadpoles and small fish
-they are usually around 3 INCHES BIG
-For them, the surface of the water is like a dance floor
-or they can ROW with the middle two of its four pairs of legs. First it swings back its third pair, then the second pair, and when both pairs are extended as far back as they can go, the spider raises them from the water and brings them forward again
-or they can GALLOP, which can propel fishing spiders at three feet per second, it's hard work. Spiders probably use it only when they need to reach top speeds to chase fast prey or to avoid becoming prey themselves. At less urgent times
-the spiders may rely on a third and more efficient form of locomotion: SAILING. When a breeze blows, fishing spiders sometimes wave their two front legs into the wind (smaller spiders raise their entire bodies) and let the breeze push them across the water like sailboats.

SO, WELCOME TO MY NEW NIGHTMARE! (let me know what they do to you in your dream)

The Moon

We ate at "The Dock Restaurant" at the river the first night we got there. Carter was getting restless so I took him outside to look at the river. That's when he said this in a sad voice:

Carter: "Ohhh...it's boken!" (pointing up to the sky)
Amber: "What?"
Carter: "The moon...it's boken."
Amber: "It's broken?"
Carter: "YAH"


We never really talk about the moon or point it out so I guess a full moon is all he's ever seen!

River with the Pitt's...

Everyone in Chad's family was able to come to the river. It was a blast!

The river is always the best vacation ever and here is what we love about it!

1. Family Photo Shoot's

Carter has been developing some horrible habits recently:
1) Picking his nose and 2) above...biting his fingernails and 3) about a month ago I found him hiding on his bed biting his toe-nails. Nasty! (And when he thinks I am preoccupied and not paying attention he starts biting my finger nails)

2. Surfing

Alexis fears very little at the river...she loves surfing with us and
can't seem to understand why we want to take turns without her on it!
She likes to do tricks with Chad and surfs without the rope with me.

"I just want to surf by myself." She really did it for a little bit.
Maybe, next year she can master it a little better.

3. Boating

Alexis loves the boat...she really misses sitting on Grandpa Miller's lap
and driving it with him. Don't worry, Dad...the boat was off in this picture.

Our family motto: "If all else fails...We will look good when we sleep!"
Nothing about this picture above was staged. Not the hair, arms, legs...nothing!
Carter was sound asleep when I went for my camera and my
laughing while snapping the shot woke him up.

There is nothing better than going out on the boat...the kids are almost always on
their best behavior. No car seat, just fun! Added bonus: the kids get sleepy being so
active...they take great naps especially on the boat! It's one of my favorites. I still
remember sleeping at my dad's feet as a kid while he drove the boat.

4. Skiing

Alexis is, like I said, FEARLESS! She loves skiing. Even if the driver starts slow
making her sink...then takes off! She just hangs on!

Carter was a different story this year. After being the youngest grandchild
to ski at 15 months old last year...he decided he wasn't thrilled about doing it this year.

Consoling Carter after another attempt at skiing.

Note to self. "Work on making pleasant faces while exercising or skiing."

5) Wake Boarding

Chad...attempting a 360. He landed it just right a few times but
could never catch the rope in time. Maybe next year!
Check out his brothers flip in the previous post! I was really trying harder this year to improve my wake boarding skills...
but on the 3rd day...I ate it! I landed on the wake, rather than clear it.
The board went back, I went forward...my body jerked out of the
wakeboard...only...my left food decided to only come out 1/2 way...
screaching me to a halt. It killed to say the least.

6. TUBING

I am not a huge fan of riding on the tube with Alexis. While you are being

whipped around at ridiculous speeds...all she does is sit in the middle with
her thumb in the air...screaming "FASTER, Daddy, FASTER!" Seriously, almost every picture of her...she has her thumb up for Chad
to go faster...I just decided to only blog one of the 20 pictures!
These were no dinky rides as you can tell. Many times...the tube flipped
and Alexis was always laughing when you picked her up. Every one else would come
in because the fall hurt...but not her! She wouldn't quit! One time she
came in after Chad had taken her with Chad's brother and she said,
"Mom, Jake flew off like five times. I only fell once, when it flipped, but he fell too."
My daughter is four right?

Basically, her only break from the "3 tube man" as she called it. This
smile lasted all of 30 seconds. We started the boat and took a group for a few
whips and all I could hear from then on out..."Is it my turn yet?"

Alexis rode with the best of them. Can you tell by the grips Chad and Jake
have on each other's life jacket...that it was a crazy ride for them, even?

Chad took his Dad, his brother-in-law Andrew and I on a tube ride...

and I got wasted when it flipped. I had a huge bruises. So you can imagine
my mood when he came around to pick me up after a horrible fall. I quit!
So Chad, his brother Jake, and his brother in law Patrick got on for a ride.
I, of course, was in the driver seat. Here they are before the ride!
Patrick said he swears he saw horns grow out of my head and smoke come
out my ears or something to that nature when I started the boat.
Can you tell...by their expressions...FEAR for your lives boys!
(Patrick...it looks like you may need to use the restroom you look so scared!)
I was in a BAD MOOD and someone was going to pay!
Hey, anyone want to come to the river with us?

Alexis was quite frustrated with this "easy ride" for Carter.
It ended in tears because it was too slow for her!

"Amber, why do you have a complex about your weight and
well, everything else for that matter?"

Ohh...NEVERMIND.
Chad's cute sisters. left to right. Katie, Alissa, Emily and Kelli wearing
one of the swim suits Katie designed for her new swim line.
Skinny, tan, gorgeous, fun, humble and not a mean bone in them!

7) Floating Down the River

Just before a family float. Alissa, Carter, Alexis and Emily.

In order to float we drive up river in a car. We were driving up a little road,
Alexis was thoroughly enjoying being in the car with no car seat and a bunch
of us girls were sitting on a tube in the back with doors and windows closed
of course. Someone made mention to hold onto Alexis in case the back door flew
open. Alexis asked "why?" to which I explained, "Well, if the door popped open you
would fly out the back and hit your head!" To which she replied, "That would be so
fun!" Then Chad's mom said, "I think you need to instill a little fear in that girl!"

8) The River House

If Alexis could live here...she would! She hates leaving! Everything about
this home is just perfect. I love the open layout...the rooms....well, just
about everything. (That's Chad fishing on the right! Another thing Alexis loves...
when Chad catches a trout he cooks it for her and every time she scarfs it down
like I would eat a twix bar, or brownies, or ice cream...but definitely not fish!)

9) The PoolBig enough to play in...but small enough to heat for New Years Eve!

And perfectly placed in the front of the house so you can see everyone
on the river! Alexis: perfecting her back layout.
Carter was collecting things from around the house one day and I
just thought he was trying to own everything he saw. But then I noticed
he picked up 4 specific things.
1) "My WOPE" (a small ski rope left on the grass by the stairs close to the dock)
2) "My FAG" (a small plastic flag from a cheap kids golf set up next to the side of the house)
3) "My BOAT" (a large blow up raft he had been floating down the river in earlier)
4) "My JACKET" ( his life jacket hanging up to dry)

Here is the workings of my two year old and his 4 things! He did this all by himself.

After insisting we put "his boat" in the pool and help him put his life jacket on,
he looped his ski rope around the boat and handed Alexis the flag and
told her to get in the boat. Then he grabbed the ski rope and yells, "HIT IT!"
Alexis smiles with a huge grin and takes the other handle to use as a wheel!

Carter's rules: When the driver stops making "vroom" sounds...
the flag goes up and you are done with your turn..because apparently
he decides when you fall and are done!

Longest post ever...I know! I have to beat my previous "longest posts ever" some how! We love the river. We had lots of fun and I have a funny and scary story...I'll share in the next post..since this is getting out of hand. Boy, time flies when Chad and Tad are next to me playing HALO at 1:30 am. I never pay attention to time when I'm blogging and I know this will be a problem when I go back to Primary tomorrow..I mean today! Maybe, I'll start primary like this: "Welcome to Primary...PLEASE BE NICE to me...I just got back from vacation and I wasted my whole night blogging last night!" That should go over well!

Jacob's Flip

4th of July

Every year our stake puts on a show for the 4th of July at our Stake Center. The kids have so much fun and this is Alexis' 3rd year participating. The little 3-5 year olds walk down the ramp in a costume that is different every year. This year the kids had to wear cheerleading outfits or sports outfits! Alexis loves being on the stage and is definitely my daughter...which I got told numerous times since I grew up in this stake and people watched me every year in this show. In fact, Chad and I first met 13 years ago when we were just 15 years old at a 4th of July practice.Alexis shaking her pom poms down the ramp!

After the 2nd of 3 shows. I realized I never take family pictures on
holidays...and I'm determined to change even though I got a nice grunt
from Chad when I asked his Dad to take our picture! Get used to it!

I loved these pictures of Alexis and me! I couldn't
decide which picture I liked better...so here's both!

After the last show, we hurried home and packed up our stuff to join Chad's family in Big
Bear. (Usually we stay in HB and watch the fireworks at the beach...but this was a nice
change. Especially since groups of people were downing HUGE bottles of liquor outside
our courtyard screaming non-sense with cow horn hats as we were packing the car!
And this was at 11am people!) When we got to Big Bear we enjoyed spending time with
Chad's grandma. She has such a great sense of humor and always keeps us laughing.
That night we watched the fire works over the lake. We always love a little weekend getaway!

Carter just chilled, which is so him!

Alexis just kept asking us when it was going to be done.
(even before it started) She's not a huge fan of fireworks!

Sugarland Concert

Chad and I celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary last month. We trade off who is in charge of planning Valentine's Day and our Anniversary. Someone told us they did that when we first got married and I have loved it! It makes it so each of us feel pampered and surprised on one of the holidays. So this year Chad was in charge of planning our date for our Anniversary. We went to dinner and a movie and he bought us tickets to see Sugarland perform at the San Diego fair last week. It was so fun. If you would have told me Chad was going to buy us tickets to a country music concert 5 years ago I would have never believed you. He as come a long way since then thanks to artist like Carrie Underwood! Chad actually really liked the concert even though he had only heard a few of their songs! It was a really great present! I loved it!